Here is what the last 100 years of civilization has taught you and I about masculinity:
- As a whole, men are all bad eggs
- Traditional male values like aggression and toughness are bad
- Women, by default, are good.
- The only good men are those who have seen the light, worked hard to rectify their innate deficiencies and have become more like women.
After decades of social programing through print, media, social media, schools, and government programs we know the drill all too well:
- The innate drive to pursue, conquer and win that is felt by every man upon the planet . . . it’s all BAD, BAD, BAD.
- We men have had our run, we’ve been “too toxic” for civilization, but now time is up.
- We’re all BAD players, and we deserve every bad thing that we get.
The woke of the world can rage against masculinity till they are blue in the face, but one fact remains: The emperor has no clothes. He is standing naked in the wind (but, he is wearing a medical facemask, thought . . .)
With every increasingly ridiculous charge, the truth becomes more clear, more visible (to those with eyes to actually see it).
Men ARE wild. Men ARE aggressive. Men ARE fundamentally different from women. You will never be happy until you understand and accept these facts. What makes the male a man is his acceptance of these amazing traits and his ability to wield and control them among those with whom he lives and associates. This is the whole purpose of the lost honor codes of the past: chivalry, the samurai bushido, the pirate “code,” and honor defined by Shakespeare and the stoics.
Masculinity is GOOD. Masculinity is a GIFT. Whether or not you believe in a higher power, masculinity was wired into the DNA of the “Y” chromosome for a reason, and it is here to stay.
No amount of hand wringing, protesting or pink vagina hat wearing will ever change that.
How you handle the “man-hate” determines EVERYTHING. We usually see one of three responses.
The most common response is to rage, retaliate and isolate from this “man-hate.” This is typical, yet, it is unproductive and it just fuels more “man-hate.”
The second response is to self-emasculate. This has been the default response for the last 40 years. It’s what young boys have been taught to do (you know, because “you’re BAD” if you even think about using your thumb and pointer finger like an imaginary gun). It leads to dysfunctional men who are depressed, who are unproductive at work, men that have no idea how to take the lead. It forces women to take on roles most tell me they do not desire.
The third response is to laugh, shake your mane, and learn to be a man, a real man. Double down on your power. Become more testicular. Build a life steeped in unapologetic LOVE and STRENGTH until you draw your very last breath.
This can only be effectively done when men TRIBE up. It has taken me many years to learn and understand the importance of my tribe.
Of course, attack your goals with the fire and frenzy of a warrior. But, you MUST find OTHER warriors to help you on your way.
Stop opting out on the couch . . . and put your ass on the line. Get back into the fray.
So what if you are scorned, vilified, or mocked. You have an empire to build, a queen to ravish, and a legacy to leave behind.
Time waits for no man.
The power you crave will NEVER be found in the tidy confines of a woman’s approval. It is out there in the wild where you carve out your kingdom one bold move at a time with a band of brothers at your back.
You will FEEL it in the hairs on your neck. You’re wired to be a warrior for life. It is why the Army Rangers and the Navy Seals are so awe inspiring to the young and old. The muscle-memory for a TRIBE of brothers is wired in your DNA, like a flattened coil that longs to spring back to its true form.
But, where do you find your tribe?
Look for the group of men that motivates you in the following ways on a regular basis:
- Physical Conditioning – This brotherhood encourages 3-6 intense workouts per week, because you cannot keep up if you don’t condition yourself.
- Correct Eating – These men talk about and encourage a palate resetting eating system that works with the hormones of the male body. They will speak of and use eating patterns that turn off cravings, enhances growth hormones, and improves brain function.
- Special Ops – They provide regular challenges and adventures built into your life each week or month that keep you engaged in the application and rewards of being a true warrior.
- Coaching – They are actively engaged in sharing and teaching those within the tribe the skills they have acquired while building their legacies.
- A Band of Brothers – men with which to laugh, to sweat (I mean really down and dirty exhausting sweat), to move through milestones of development and with whom you prove your greatness on and off the battle field of life.
This is my TRIBE:
When men evaluate each other as men, they subconsciously look for the virtues necessary to help keep the perimeter. Men respond to and admire the qualities that would make men useful and dependable in an emergency.
Men have always had a role apart. Whether they admit it or not, they still, to this very day, judge one another according to the demands of that role as a guardian in a tribe struggling for survival against encroaching doom. Everything that is specifically about being a man – not merely a person – has to do with that role.
Men cannot be men — much less good or heroic men — unless their actions have meaningful consequences to people they truly care about. Strength requires an opposing force, courage requires risk, mastery requires hard work, honor requires accountability to other men.
Without these things, we are little more than boys playing at being men, and there is no weekend retreat or mantra or half-assed rite of passage that can change that. A rite of passage must reflect a real change in status and responsibility for it to be anything more than theater. No re-imagined manhood of convenience can hold its head high so long as the earth remains the tomb of our ancestors.